How simple it is to observe people looking the other way . . . when betrayed, or attacked, or mistreated in the many ways these hurtful actions can be applied. More difficult by far is seeing ourselves in this role -- the victim, the martyr, the One Who Is Wronged.
It may be similar to feeling that one is drowning -- if there is a straw floating nearby, grabbing for it would not be out of the question in that kind of panic. No available options create illusory possibilities . . . any port in a storm, a mirage in the desert. Just make up something, all cannot really be lost.
In relationships, looking the other way is at base denial. If it isn't acknowledged, then it isn't real and that wave of pain and desertion won't wash over like a tsunami, leaving a wasteland when it recedes. Just make up a story, any story . . . or accept one which the offending party is spinning, and it's all okay.
This condition appears pitiful and sad to those who have no emotional stock in the situation. While using lies may appear to be life-saving at the moment -- think false hope pinned to a slippery slope. In truth, it is a questionable remedy, a soothing temporary balm on deep wounds which can be life-threatening, but most certainly are severely damaging.